Stop men: Be merciful! [Archives:2007/1069/Community]

July 19 2007

By: Lamis Abdulkarim Shuga'a
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The stress of life; work, study, problems, difficulties, etc. , in a way or other, makes a lot of men busy so, as a result, they ignore and sometimes forget the simplest rights, and the most important ones at the same time, which must be done.

Socially speaking, every man has his own way, style, and thought while dealing with others whether with his family, friends, strangers, sellers and so on. Some of them are kind with people and others are rude whereas some of them are neither.

No one can deny the fact that people in general like to be loved and respected by others. In other words, they mostly need to hear nice speech and sweet words which, can be also expressed as good conducts. But since a woman, who is considered as “half of the society”, works nowadays inside as well as outside her house, her responsibilities and duties increase day after day, which burdens “her shoulders” and makes her tired.

Therefore, I concentrate upon the fair sex, i.e., the women whether they are mothers, wives, sisters, daughters, and so on. That is because, in my opinion, they need special treatment and that is the duty of every man. The men must realize that that treatment, i.e. pitiful words, emotional behavior, cheerful style, etc., at times is regarded as the power and the energy that women almost need to ease the continual fatigue of life.

As a matter of fact, women, in their natures, are sensitive and affectionate and if they are granted cordiality and friendliness they remarkably deal with others lovingly. Moreover, they do as hard as they can, producing the best without boring or complaining. Women, simply, can be likened to a plant, the more care it gets, the more fruits it produces. Even if women are considered as machines, the machines themselves need fuel. We have to know the fact that, on the other hand, a woman is a woman whatever she becomes, e.g., a professor, a doctor, a judge, an engineer, etc., she is still that weak creature whose heart is eager to feel love and sympathy.

Several men, in a way or other, ignore that fact. They are dealing with their women as if they are “important” pieces of furniture which must be existed in any house ignoring also a traditional proverb which says: “A sweet word breaks the dried wooden rod”. Those women usually receive only strict orders and harsh instructions. However, a lot of them are the givers, I mean; their hearts are the source of love and affection. They still work without boredom.

Indeed, some women, especially wives, are materialists. They like presents, gold, perfumes, etc., as a type of “nice treatment” accepting them from their husbands happily even if they get those presents coldly and thoughtlessly. And since this class of wives is cold-hearted, their lives with their husbands are free from love and emotion that is because, from their points of view, presents are the most important.

I think that those women, sorry to say that, are “abnormal” and, moreover, are losers, of course. How can they prefer presents instead of words full of compassion and affection? What kind of life will be among those without love?

Generally, our Islamic Religion instructs us to deal with others in a suitable and respected way. That is clear in the Prophet's Hadieth “smiling to your brother is charity”. It can be also noticed that Islam recommends men to be most careful while dealing with their women who are compared to “glassy bottles”. As an ideal example, we can observe how the Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) dealt with others in general and with his women in specific.

Thus, a special call must be given to men: take care of your women whether they are your mothers, whom the paradise is under their feet, wives, sisters, daughters, etc. Life is not only study or work or even money. Life, in short, means how you can make others around you feel happy, drawing smiles on their faces. Finally, we can add, live your life on all its sides not only from one side.