The tragic sequences of having many children [Archives:2002/20/Last Page]

Written by Abdulrahman Mutahhar
Translated by Janet Watson
Ma Musid, do you still have the tiniest bit of compassion and sympathy left for your son, or are we just going to sit back and watch him suffer with his eight children when his fathers still around?
M Thats enough of his fathers still around! Tell me what you want me to do, will you, and get to the point!
Ma I want you to consider your sons situation properly and help him out a bit.
M Whats wrong with his situation?
Ma What do you mean, Whats wrong with his situation? Ever since he became a father and had eight children, one after the other, hes been in an absolute fix.
M I know.
Ma He doesnt know who he should send to school, who he should clothe, or who he should take to the doctor. You can see the mess hes in. And the poor mother has lost her health and energy as a result of having eight children, one after the other. If anyone saw her theyd think she was fifty years old when shes only twenty-seven. You really must help him out.
M But what would he do with my help if I did help him? What would he even be able to do with help from the state or the United Nations?
Ma He doesnt need help from the state or the United Nations. Youre his father, and its more important that you help him than any other Tom, Dick or Harry.
M How should I help him, though? Kick the tenant out into the street with his children? Theyre not animals, Musida.
Ma Okay, if you dont want to kick the tenant out of your house, how about paying his rent to solve his problems?
M Musida, if I thought that money would solve his problems, Id let him have this house and hand over the rent from the other house, but the problem is his family which hes built up on rotten foundations.
Ma What do you mean?
M He didnt take into account all the responsibilities of marriage and having children from the beginning, Musida.
Ma What use is there is talking about the beginning and the end when the situation is there before our eyes?
M The situation is that the mothers health and the future and happiness of the generations is dependent first and foremost on family planning from the moment someone starts to think of getting married.
Ma Look, Ive told you, hes got eight kids now, Musid, and God alone knows the state that every single one of them is in the father, the mother and the children.
M Im talking to you about exactly that. The mothers health has suffered because of having eight children without a break. Thats the first thing.
Ma Okay.
M The second thing is that the eight children havent been able to receive the care they need and suffer from illness and malnutrition. On top of that, they are all suffering from different emotional stresses.
Ma Go on!
M The third thing is that the father has found himself in a fix which neither his father, nor his mother, nor the entire United Nations can help him out of. Do you see, Musida?
Ma For goodness sake!
M Hang on a minute, will you! They say someone asked his friend whether it was possible to go out before he went in. The friend said, No. The first one said, Oh but you can. Just stay where you are! And this is whats happened to your son.
Ma Will you stop talking in riddles! Just tell me what will solve our sons problem.
M Our sons problem, Musida, is not unique. Its found throughout Yemeni society as a whole.
Ma Just get up and do what you can, and leave the rest of society to God!
M Why dont you do something yourself and save your legs.
Ma Look, Im being serious. Either you free up the house for him, or you offer to pay the rent on the house hes in at the moment. Either way it would solve his problem.
M Havent I already told you that the problem is not the house! The problem is that after getting married and having eight children, the father and mother found themselves unable to bring up the children properly or ensure the happiness of the family.
Ma People have children and to Hell with the consequences. No one waits till they can ensure family happiness. They wouldnt even wait for Aunt Saida.1
M That isnt what I mean. Family planning at the stage when people are thinking of getting married guarantees the happiness and stability of society as a whole. Also the lad should get an education and a proper job and wage first so that hes in a position to provide for himself and his family. And finally, the mother should breast-feed her child for two years, as decreed by God in His Holy Book, because breast-feeding makes sure that the mother stays healthy. Its also a religious obligation, and it helps the mother have a two-year break between the first and the second child. What happened to your son, though, and to many other families, is the opposite. They got married before they had the economic means. The mothers health suffered because of having eight children one after the other. And the poor children are suffering not only from health problems and malnutrition, but also from psychological stress, because theyre not getting the care they need. The reason for all this, Musida, is that people get married and have children without planning things properly, and its mothers and children and the whole of the rest of society who suffer. God Almighty said in His Holy Book, God wishes things to be easy for you. He does not wish things to be difficult.
1 Pun in Arabic.

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