Remorseful family, a story [Archives:2006/963/Reportage]

July 13 2006

By: Nawal Zaid
Being the only one in his family, Hamid Humaid's parents gave him everything he needed during his childhood. However, they didn't teach him how to be of help in his society, so he became a parasite, without the ability to help himself or others.

Humaid lived a life full of rashness and waste. He smoked cigarettes at an early age and used to associate with wicked friends, who led him to do all sorts of ugly things like drinking alcohol and watching pornographic films.

He married a girl from a poor and conservative family. She had a very bad life with him because he didn't care about her. Senseless from heavy drinking, he used to come home and beat and abuse her. Furthermore, he forced her to do immoral things, as she had no one to resort to because her parents had died when she was young.

Humaid narrates his story, saying, “My wife has suffered a lot with me. When she gave birth to our first son, I wasn't there, nor did I care about it. The case was nearly the same with our other sons, who now number 10. Unfortunately, I didn't know their names, the number of them or anything about their studies. I didn't ask about them or their health. Also, I didn't know whether they ate or not. I didn't know from where they ate, how they lived or who provided for them. I only cared about myself.

I used to spend most of my time out. When I returned home, I came drunk, not knowing what I did. I didn't feel ashamed from Allah, my children or my wife. In fact, I used to send the children to bring wine. I also forced them to drink and sell it, although they were very young. Most of the time, I let my evil friends into my house without paying attention to the sanctity of my wife, daughters or our house.

I didn't encourage my children to study or provide them with proper conditions for that and this pained my poor wife. Not only this, I also forced my wife to work as a house servant to earn money to cover our children's demands. She refused to provide for the children from my money because it was ill-gotten. She exerted efforts to raise them in a good manner so they wouldn't be like me.

With the passage of time, my children matured. They always viewed me as a corrupt man and had no feelings toward me. I began to feel jealous of my children's love for their mother. She became overtired from her constant work at various houses. Out of jealousy, I used to force her to stay awake until late evening, sometimes ordering her to stand on one leg. Other times, I asked her to prepare fresh bread for me late at night. Despite this, she rose early to go to work and returned at the end of the day. She became tired from her constant work and furthermore, she was suffering from many diseases, but she didn't complain.

My sons began to feel restless and decided to leave home to rely on themselves. My eldest son, Najeeb, said he felt sad because he was unable to change the home situation and prevent his father from drinking and committing crimes. Feeling unable to do anything, Najeeb left home, followed by another son. They lived together in a small room, worked and studied at the same time. My other sons were under my control and didn't pursue their education. Instead, they worked with me and followed my sinful path.

As time elapsed, the situation didn't improve, rather, it worsened. Sometimes, upon seeing my children's loss, I give up drinking and start praying, but then I'm overcome by my lust and return to my previous situation. Advancing in age, I began to take drugs. I didn't care about my health and I had no mercy on my children or my wife. My fame has become very bad in my surroundings and no one dares to ask for my daughters' hands.

With the passage of time, my problems spiraled out of control, sometimes demanding interference from neighbors or police. Surprisingly, I fought my sons in their work and used to beat them in front of their friends because I didn't want them to be better than me.

Once when I was drunk, I went to visit my daughter who was studying at an institute. I began beating her in front of her friends, so she decided not to attend there anymore out of humiliation.

My case didn't change with time's passing and things became more complex. Suddenly, I was badly afflicted with paralysis. Instead of being sad, my family members were happy to see me paralyzed, maybe because of the sternness with which I used to treat them. Offering help and service to me, they further began to pray for me. I now feel remorseful for the loss of my family. Despite all this, I feel life has become better. My wife has begun singing on occasions of marriage and the like, thereby receiving quite a handsome sum of money.

She restored to me our sons who left home and now I ask them to forgive me. I have caused them to become lost, as well as their future. Some of my sons took the vice road, as Mohammed said, “I'm lost and my future also is lost due to my father. I cannot be a good individual, as I am used to moral corruption since I was a child.”

Najeeb says, “I am the oldest son and I'll do my best to keep my family and improve our home situation,” whereas my wife says, “I'll pray to Allah to guide my sons and save them. I'll also do my best to improve my house and family and serve my husband for Allah's sake.”