To marry educated or uneducated women? Part 4 [Archives:2008/1179/Community]

August 7 2008

Having surveyed the aspects of marrying educated and uneducated women in the three previous parts of this topic, it is time to conclude the topic with making a contrast between the two cases in regard to the men's conditions and circumstances. Firstly I thank those who sent their responses, commenting on the points of the previous parts. I did really like their viewpoints which show some new aspects of marrying educated and uneducated women.

In this article, though I refer to real stories, I also reveal my point of views about the topic. What I am going to do here is to shed light on how the educational level of the man influences his choice whether to marry educated or uneducated women.

Actually, there are many other factors which influence men's selection of wives like the financial status, the cultural tendency and so on. The factor of the educational level of both plays a role in the marriage life success. So according to the educational level of both each man and woman should choose his/her husband and wife. The following cases show how the marriage life is influenced by the educational status of the man and of the women.

I think, a well-educated man faces many problems when he marries uneducated woman. By problem, I do not mean financial, social or emotional problems but exactly the problems of understanding. Understanding each other is, I think, something essential for marriage life. Of course, the thinking of an educated man would be completely different from the thinking of the uneducated women. This creates a clash between such husband and wife.

To illustrate the point, I would like to refer to a real story. A university doctor has uneducated wife. He always thinks about more future studies and researches, aiming to get higher degrees, updating his knowledge in his specialization. He gives this thing the priority, doing best to achieve his goals. “I never get any support from my wife to do so”, he said, claiming that she always blames him for shortcomings which occur because of his deep interest only in the academic field. As he said “problems occur from time to time so that I get fade up”, deciding either to stop his academic interest or divorce her.

Such a husband may prove to be ignorant towards his wife and her duties. That may be true and she has the right to fight for them. But the point also indicates that she do not pay attention to his dreams which she must be proud of. This, I think, will not be the same as in the case of the educated woman.

The above example shows the clashes which occur in the marriage life due to the lack of the mutual understanding between the husband and wife. Such marriage may continue for sometime because of some social or family considerations especially if the husband and wife are relatives. But, we can say, or at least I can say, that this marriage has failed.

In comparison with this, the marriage of educated man and educated woman will succeed if the other things like love, social status, etc are achieved. Regarding the example stated above, the failure of marriage is because of the lack of harmony in the understanding between the couple. Such a lack is apparently resulted because of the difference between the education of the wife and husband.

This is only one case in which the difference of the educational level of the husband and the wife may lead to marriage failure. So both men and women who think or who are about to get married must be aware of so that they avoid any bad circumstances later.

Majed Thabet Al-kholidy is a writer from Taiz, currently doing his M.A. at English Dep, Taiz Uni. He is an ex-editor of English Journal of the University.